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the more i care about something, the worse i make it becomes,

i remember when i was small, i have a nice pen, but i care for it so much, i rather let my sister had it in place of me so that i won't spoil it later.....well, i dun get to use the pen

it seems like whenever i care too much for something, i cant be myself, and when i'm not being myself, i make things worse.....

if u see me good at things, dun praise me, i just simply dun care .....
if u see me not good at things, plz forgive me to care ..........

how i wish i can care for nothing from now on......then i would good in anythings.....

should i be happy with things that i'm good at? i cant coz i dun care about those things, i dun appreciate
should i dun care about things that i'm not good at? i cant too, coz i care for those things.....i appreciate.....

i just get things that i dun wan, and i cant get the things that i wan...